It’s been a very sad and
stressful week, and I’m tired.
Tuesday morning the boys left for
Florida with Aiden’s Uncle. They spend two weeks each summer down there with
him. They left around 8:00 am and arrived safely at 7:37 pm. The house is very
empty and quiet. I miss them.
Then yesterday morning I found
out that my daughter (who is an addict) was admitted to the hospital with endocarditis.
It seems that this is prevalent in IV drug users.
According to the Mayo Clinic, “Endocarditis is
an infection of the endocardium, which is the inner lining of your heart
chambers and heart valves. Endocarditis generally occurs when bacteria,
fungi or other germs from another part of your body, such as your mouth, spread
through your bloodstream and attach to damaged areas in your heart.”
She told her friends not to tell
me, but they did anyway. The hospital will treat her and probably release her when she’s
stable. She may need heart surgery, but I’m not sure what the hospital’s policy
is on treating active users… so I’m not sure what will happen.
I have been sleeping pretty well
since the boys left which surprises me, but it is probably because I’ve been
busy at work. I went to bed at the usual time and at about 10:30 pm the phone
rang. It was the husband of a friend of mine who is in the last stages of
pancreatic cancer. I was afraid that she had passed so I answered the phone.
Although, her time is close, he just needed someone to talk to… so I listened
as best I could with my sleepy foggy brain… for about thirty minutes. Then went
back to sleep.
During sleep I dreamed that I was
driving a car and that I kept losing control and running into things. I
evidently had a passenger who I was scaring the bejezzus out of… not sure who
it was. It was very strange. I must have made noises because this morning my
dog came back to lay down with me after my son let her out this morning. She
almost never does that.
My stomach always, ALWAYS, gets
upset when I’m under stress so 4:30 am found me running to the bathroom. When
my son got home at 5:00 am I hadn’t quite fallen back to sleep, and at 6:00 am
my alarm went off… time to get ready for work.
This morning I got a text from a
friend telling me that my old dog, Trinity, passed away earlier this week. When
my ex-husband, Jerome, and I separated, she stayed him so I hadn’t seen her in
about nine years. She was 16 and a half years old, and I know that dogs don’t
live forever, but I would have liked to see her before she died.
So it’s been a very sad and
stressful, and I’m tired.
